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    We become concert pianists more often than you'd expect. We score better than almost everyone else on the latest Pew test to gauge how much Americans know about religion.

    The data confused me, so I tried not to think about it. This was a part of our Jewishness (which is not to say that all of these things aren't also a vital part of other people's religious and cultural identities).

    This results in me getting checked out a lot by yeshiva students, especially when I'm wearing a skirt that covers my knees. He isn't interested in entering the debate, or getting tangled in all the messy rules of identification. When I joined a dating site, my mother kept trying to convince me to switch to JDate. I got the sense from so many people that I had to marry a Jew. Another thought I was too involved in ritual observance. I fell in love with him so smoothly that I couldn't stop to wonder about his religious identity.

    I also once got harassed by a bunch of giant, blond guys in a parking lot by the beach. In my bikini, shaking from the cold and from anger, I screamed back at them. I'm getting married in less than a month, to a man everyone assumes is Jewish. When he moved across the country for a job and couldn't celebrate Christmas with his family, he worked through Christmas day instead. I dated about an equal number of Jews and non-Jews, but marriage was always far off, and it implied other things, like the rest of my life, and kids who would require bar and bat mitzvahs. I dated two devout Christians who thought my Judaism was perfect, fascinating, and sexy, and a Jew who agreed. He can't play scales or arpeggios (so it's lucky that I can). But when I think about it, I realize that our relationship feels Jewish to me. They taught me to care deeply about social justice issues, and to be sensitive to other people's needs and situations.

    Rabbi Lapin, you are my rabbi for many years – I listen and recommend to all my friends your CDs, I read books and listen to podcasts, sometime more then one time…

    I always find something new, and most importantly you always manage to lift my spirits.

    Avi, writing, “Every Jewish woman should read this book.” Leaving aside my bristling at her liberal use of the term “shiksa,” (will her next book be “Secrets To Playing Basketball Like a Schvartze”?

    When you say, ‘Russian’ you are not referring to anyone Jewish who is from Russia. We assume the ‘Russian’ of which you speak is most likely not connected to any religion at all or possibly from a Christian Russian Orthodox background.

    I remember that I have never even considered marrying someone outside of my “tribe”, so to speak…

    But my sister is married for almost 40 years to a wonderful Russian man, who I love dearly.

    In short, follow “The Rules,” the 1995 best-selling dating manual written by, ahem, two Jewish women!

    In fact, “Rules” authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, who I actually saw debate Rabbi Shmuley Boteach many years ago, in a veritable orgy of self-promotion, have bestowed a blurb upon Ms.

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